This is Me...

I have been thinking a lot about this lately, and started to come to some conclusions. I am so hard on myself and have such high expectations for myself. I know that I am not the only mom that does this. I would love to be the mom who has it all together and does it all, all the while having perfect, well-behaved children. But, I am not, and probably despite what I think I see in other moms, they aren’t either.

I am not super-mom. There I said it! I try to do everything, but have realized this year that I can’t. I don't have the time or the energy to do it all, and to keep up with everything else in my life, which includes a small baby! I am such a perfectionist about things, and get overwhelmed when I know that I can not possibly get things done the way I want them done. So much so, that I tend to put off doing things because I don't know where to start. My "to-do" list just keeps on growing. I end up getting distracted while working on one project, and totally start off on something else, while putting something else away that belongs in another room. Or Lily wakes up from her nap and won't let me put her down. I never seem to get anything finished that I start lately! My house is always a mess, and there is no way to keep up with all the clutter. Unfortunately, I see no end to the mess in the foreseeable future, so I just have to accept that this is the way it is. My problem is letting anyone else see our mess, which I also need to let go of, and welcome friends in, no matter the current state of chaos around here!! (Which I've also realized no one else really notices it as much as I do!)

So, I am putting myself out there. I need to accept and realize that I can't be anybody other than me! I have three young kids who need me and need my attention. The house will be fine if it doesn't get cleaned, my piles of stuff will still be here next week, my friends will still like me no matter what mess I am living in, no one will really notice if I don't bake anything for the bake sale at the school fundraiser, my blog will still be waiting for me until I have time to post again (oh how I beat myself up about not posting!). I can only do so many things, and I can not keep stretching myself so thin. I am blessed to have my home, my wonderful husband, and my beautiful babies, and extremely blessed to be able to be home all the time with them (how did I fit work in too???). I need to live in the here and now, and enjoy every moment, and quit getting caught up in all of the things that need to get done. If only it was that easy!